Another Journey begins.....

I attended a workshop last night on Thought Leadership. It was AMAZING....and it really inspired me! One of the things that we were asked to do was to share a story of a critical moment in our lives and the lesson/lessons we learned from it. As these lessons almost always directly impact our leadership style. I was somewhat surprised at how easy that came for me. It was suggested to us that we write our stories down - if only for ourselves. I prefer to share. Here is one of my many critical moments.

I had my son Devan when i had just turned 19yrs old. He was born the Friday of the first week of classes of the spring semester of my sophomore year of college. I took off the next week and was back in class. Most people thought i was crazy. That thought did cross my mind a time or two as well - but i preferred to look at it as being determined. Determined not to become a statistic. I refused to be the teen mother who dropped out of school and remained on welfare her entire life. Devan had given me yet another reason to succeed.

About a year and a half after he was born, I found myself seriously struggling financially. I soon received a notice from the housing complex i lived in that unless i paid my rent which i had fallen behind on, i was going to be evicted from my apartment. Although i had family members that i could have asked for help, i was too proud and refused to ask them. This was MY problem and i had to deal with it as such.

One day as i was driving through town, i felt something take over and "guide" me. I ended up in a Catholic church parking lot. While i do believe in a higher power, growing up with an Irish Catholic mother and a Jewish father, i was not raised to subscribe to any particular religion. I was raised to embrace all religions and celebrate the differences. Yet there i was in the parking lot of a catholic church. I sat there for what seemed like a lifetime and simply cried. I couldn't understand how this could be happening to me or how i could have put my son in this situation. I was really trying to do everything "right". I was getting exceptional grades in my classes, taking care of my son the best way i knew how, yet still i found myself in a situation where i was failing. Failing not only myself, but more importantly my son.

As i was sitting there in an empty church parking lot crying, i found myself starting to pray. Asking my higher power for guidance to find my way out of the storm that was brewing over me. Again i felt "guided". This is when everything changed and a critical moment in my life occurred. Still not really sure why, I mustered up all the energy i had, got out of the car and walked into the church. Almost immediately a priest appeared in front of me. I stopped and looked at him as he greeted me and said "hello, can i help you with something". I looked at him and then i lost it. The tears began to stream down my face. I know he could see the pain i was experiencing. He asked me if i would like to go into his office to talk. As my emotions took over all i could do was shake my head yes.

A few moments later we were in his office. I continued to try to get my emotions under control as he patiently waited for me to get myself together. Once i had finally calmed down, he said to me "tell me whats going on". I proceeded to tell him my story. How i was a single mother trying to do the right thing. Trying to raise my son right, trying to excel in my studies so that i could give my son a better life. I couldn't understand what i was doing wrong and why i was struggling so much. The tears continued to flow and I then told him about my eviction notice. I went on to tell him how i felt "lost" and somewhat "hopeless". Once I got it all out I remember feeling like a million pounds had been lifted off of my shoulders. I actually remember taking a deep breath and feeling relieved that I had gotten it all out, the tears included. What I honestly didn't expect is what happened next.

The priest looked at me with warm concerned eyes and went on to say the following;
"Courtney, i appreciate that you have shared your story with me. It sounds to me like you are really trying to do the best you can for you and your son. I need you to understand what I'm about to do is a one time deal. On behalf of the church, I'm going to write a check to your landlord to cover the rent that you are behind. I want you to know that you are always welcome here, but i don't ever expect to see you back here for THIS reason".

I was astonished to say the least. Never did i once think i was going to be "bailed out" by a catholic church that i wasn't even a member of. It wasn't really even the reason that i ended up there to begin with. I honestly think i just needed someone to listen to me. I needed to vent. I needed to get it all out in order for me to process it. Never did i expect to receive the gift that i received that day.

So now the lessons i learned. While I'm not sure I understood the true impact of these lessons immediately, I am certainly confident I see it clearly now.

Lesson 1 - Give assistance to those you don't know... just because. You cant possible truly know what is actually going on in someones life unless they decide to share it with you. More often than not they will choose not to share out of fear of judgement or sheer humiliation.

Lesson 2 - Be kind to others. A simple smile or a kind word can change someones life more than you realize.

Lesson 3 - Always have faith that things will work themselves out. Life has a way of twisting and turning but there is ALWAYS light at the end of the tunnel.

Lesson 4 - Learn from your downfalls. This defining moment in my life taught me more lessons than i can even put into words.

And so begins my journey of discovering my leadership values.